At the hospital, I checked into the triage unit, as the doctor has asked me to do. When we arrived, the nurse led me immediately to a room to be hooked up to a fetal heart rate monitor and blood pressure monioring. I was supposed to lay there and be monitored for an hour, but it ended up being more like 3. We were hungry and excited to leave the hospital and eat some In-N-Out Burger when we were done. Just as we were discussing this, the doctor came and told us that the blood pressure was not better--even at a resting rate. She said the baby's heart rate was fine but she wanted to do an ultrasound just to be sure. I was excited for the ultrasound! Another sneak peak at my little one was a welcome delight! After the ultrasound, she told me that I had preeclempsia--a condition in which high blood pressure caused by pregnancy can result in heat attack or stroke of the mother and cause distress for the baby. She said the only "cure" for this was delivery. I was fine with that. Meeting in a few days was an exciting thought! She told me that she had already reserved the Operating Room for 3:00 that afternoon--I was going to have the baby TODAY! After the doctor left, I cried and cried. I'm not ready to have this baby. My house is a mess, my parents are 2,000 miles away, this is a C-section (!) and my plans for school were nowhere near ready. This wasn't how it was supposed to happen! James called everyone that needed to know and let them know what was happening. His family lived nearby and they rushed over to be with me for a few minutes before the surgery. I was holding up okay until they prayed with me just before I was wheeled into the O.R. I was a blubbering mess.
I was awake during the surgery. Though a bit hazy and dizzy, I could feel the doctors pulling and prying the baby out. I just kept looking at James and he stroked my head--he was excited to be a Daddy and that made me excited. The whole thing just seemed like it was happening to someone else. When the doctors pulled Katherine out and I heard her little cry, I knew life would forever be different. James got to hold her right away and I got my turn after I was sewed up and in the recovery room. I was shaking like crazy--I don't know if it was a reaction to the anesthetic or in fear, but I didn't hold her long, for fear that I would drop her. My Dad rushed to the airport as soon as James called him from the triage room that afternoon and arrived late that night. I was so glad to see my Daddy. I don't care how old you are--there is something comforting about a Daddy. I spend the next 24 hours without my baby recovering from the surgery in some excruciating pain. I don't remember why I couldn't see Katherine, but I was upset about it. This was one reason I didn't want a C-section--I wanted to bond with my baby right away. My mom, who was on a business trip, spent that night in the airport because all flights were canceled due to snow storms. I can't imagine what she was feeling knowing that her baby had a baby and she couldn't be there. She made it to San Diego on the night of the 14th. Again, more tears for me--there's something about the comfort of a mother. I remember how glad she was to be there and how excited she was to hold her granddaughter.
After 5 days in the hospital, I was allowed to go home with my baby. This was exciting and terrifying all at the same time--it's amazing that after being under such careful watch for 9 months to make sure you are doing your best to grow a healthy baby, they just let you take it home to figure things out as you go.
I adore this little girl. She's now almost 4 years old. A beautiful, happy girl, with lots of opinions and a joy of learning new things! She's still my snuggle bug and I hope she won't mind being one for several more year--for my benefit.
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This is one of my favorite pictures!
Look how happy my husband is to see his little girl!
My little baby bear the day we brought her home.
(I bought this hat soon after I found out I was pregnant.)
And this is Katherine now--
my 3 year old baby, and her friend, Baxter Bear,
enjoying our nightly story time
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